1779801738937
May 26, 2026 13:22
· 2:14
· English
· Whisper Turbo
· 2 Mga Speaker
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Pagsasama-sama lamang
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Once upon a time,
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when I was asked to be a mediator,
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I wanted to know why I was chosen.
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And so there was a situation where there were five lawyers from all these different
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states, and I get a call from one of the lawyers,
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and he says to me,
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we've chosen you to mediate this case.
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I said,
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okay, that's terrific.
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Can you tell me why you chose me?
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And he said,
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we needed a skirt.
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Now, there were several directions I could go at that point,
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and one of them was to stand on the National Organization for Women's Soapbox and
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say all sorts of not very complimentary things to the person on
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the phone.
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And there was a little bias in me to do that,
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to say this is not how we talk to each other and this is inappropriate.
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And then there was the other part of me that said,
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wait a minute, you just got a whole lot of information from one sentence.
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Get yourself out of it.
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Get yourself centered and ask the follow -up question,
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which is what is important about me being a skirt?
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And he said we have five lawyers.
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They're all men.
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We have five clients.
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Four out of the five are men.
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It's a conservatorship case and the one who's female
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is the youngest of five siblings.
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And she has basically said that she will not listen to
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one more man,
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that she has seen too much testosterone in the room,
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and that all her brothers have been telling her what to do for as long as she can remember,
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and she's not going to do what any of them say.
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So Nina,
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we need a skirt.
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And I said,
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then I'm your skirt.
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The interesting thing to me was that there
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was this part of me that was reacting really strongly to being...
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What could be described as being treated disrespectfully there was the other part
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of me that says Part of you being able to be dealt with with respect is
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your ability to take that and not react to it and use it in a constructive
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way and so I decided I wasn't going to react I was going to respond
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and So it kind of brought gender implicit bias all
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of that together in one story
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